Social Stories: A Simple Way to Help Your Child Feel More Prepared

If your child finds change hard — whether it’s a rainy day, a school trip, or Nana coming to stay — you’re not alone.

Many tamariki thrive on routine. When something unexpected happens, it can feel confusing or overwhelming. That’s where social stories can really help.

What Is a Social Story?

A social story is a short, simple explanation of what’s going to happen and why. It helps answer the questions children often have but may not know how to ask:

• What’s happening?
• Why is it happening?
• What will I need to do?
• What if I feel worried?

Social stories were first developed by Carol Gray in the 1990's to support children with autism, but today they’re widely used by families to help all children feel more prepared and confident.

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Even positive events can feel overwhelming without preparation. Social stories are about building understanding.

When Might a Social Story Help?

There are lots of everyday situations where a social story can make a big difference:

Weather Changes

A planned trip to the playground might suddenly turn into an indoor day. A social story can explain:

• Why we can’t go outside
• What we will do instead
• That it’s okay to feel disappointed

School or Early Childhood Changes

• A relief teacher
• A school assembly
• A kapa haka performance
• Starting at a new kura or ECE centre

Trips Away From Home

• A school trip
• Visiting whānau in another city
• Staying in a motel or going camping
• Flying on a plane for the first time

Appointments

• GP visits
• Dental check-ups
• Hospital appointments
• A haircut

Knowing what will happen step-by-step often reduces anxiety.

Why Social Stories Work

New places mean new routines — and that can feel big. Children feel safer when they know what to expect.

Instead of saying, “It’ll be fine,” a social story explains why it will be fine — and what your child can do if they feel unsure.

They help by:

• Reducing surprises
• Giving clear, concrete information
• Offering simple coping ideas
• Supporting independence

For children who struggle with transitions, this can be incredibly reassuring.

An Example of a Social Story: Rainy Day Change

Tomorrow it might rain. When it rains, we can't go to the park. The playground could be slippery and unsafe. Instead, we will stay inside and choose an indoor activity. I might feel disappointed. That's okay. I can choose a puzzle, a game, or do baking with Mum. Rainy days can still be fun.

Notice how this story:

• Explains what will happen
• Gives a reason
• Acknowledges feelings
• Offers a clear alternative

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Tips for Writing Your Own Social Story

You don’t need to be a teacher - you know your child best. Just keep it short, clear, positive and honest.

You may like to include images. If you can, use photos of real places  — their school gate, the airport, Nana’s house. Familiar images can be very powerful.

Read your social story together with your child a few times before the event.

If your child struggles with change, it’s not because they’re being difficult. It’s often because they need more information and reassurance.

Social stories give them that extra support. Sometimes, a few simple sentences can turn a stressful situation into something manageable — even empowering.

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